Our Writers

Tom

tom

Tom -- though he has a rather unassuming name -- has been writing about sex and humor, and the many ways that two go together so well, for a number of years. A man as quiet and unpretentious as his name, Tom nevertheless has a boiling pit of puns, witty one-liners and lame jokes that will have you snorting in surprised glee that bubble just beneath the surface of his exterior. Strong, no-nonsense writing is Tom's specialty as he works to bring a special angle to even the most talked about sexual suggestion.

Juniper

juniper

Juniper is always ready with an opinion -- regardless of what the conversation entails. Want to talk about the latest sex-related blunder that everyone saw on network tv last night? Wondering about that outfit you thought about buying during  your last visit to your neighborhood sex shop? Juniper is right there, ready to bring you her take on life when it involves sex. Petite, perky and persistent, you can count on at least one of your conversation with Juniper to wind up here on our site if you talk to her long enough.

Tyra

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Tyra loves to titillate readers with the content that she posts on Sex-Press-Release.com. Naturally flirtatious, Tyra keeps us laughing the entire time we read her writing. If there is a catchy angle or a slick trick that can come out of a sexual innuendo, you can be sure that Tyra is right on it. Her wicked sense of humor keeps her readers on their toes and she is not for the faint of heart.

Sebastian

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Sebastian has been regularly informed by his long-suffering mother, various girlfriends and assorted neighbors that he is a teenage boy stuck in a grown man's body. Blessed with a sense of humor that always seems to have a rather crude thread running through it, Sebastian is the kind of guy that you want at every party you throw. He always knows how to make everyone laugh -- no matter what the occasion -- and his easy, rolling way of speaking translates perfectly into his prose. Look for Sebastian to wax poetic on all things sex and humor here with us.

Bunny

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Though Bunny's name conjures up images of a sweet, soft and delicate woman-child, her true nature is not rooted in that type of innocence. When coupled with her sparkling baby blue eyes, her platinum blonde hair and cherub cheeks, one might wonder if Bunny has ever even heard any sexual humor and why are we sullying her innocence. Contrary to her angelic looks, though Bunny has the mouth of a sailor, a bold, crisp style of writing and more dirty jokes tucked up her sleeve than you can shake a stick at. We've learned a thing or two from reading her prose and eagerly await her next submission.

Jacques

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Jacqueline became Jacques long after he started writing. Growing up as a girl, he quickly realized that his sexual organs did not match his biological feelings. While this realization has come to mean that a number of awkward incidents punctuated his teen and early years, Jacques has a knack for turning such occurrences around and looking at them through a lens of humor. With a witty style that contains generous amounts of sexual innuendo -- if not outright sex talk -- Jacques is the kind of writer who fits right in whenever sex talk is being bandied about.

Billy Bob

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Billy Bob is a hawking, towering giant of a man who has a soft spot for sex, writing, wine and sleep -- not necessarily in that order. Often teased for his writing as a child, Billy Bob began to let his inner muse show its face when he set off to see the world. While that trip 'round the world began on one coast of the US and ended on its opposite coast -- without any foreign country hopping in the middle -- Billy Bob saw and experienced enough that he could no longer contain all of his knowledge and ideas. Writing for Sex-Press-Release.com is his perfect job and he wouldn't have it any other way.

Veronika

veronika

Hello everyone! I'm excited to be here and welcome you to the newest feature on Sex-Press-Release.com. I'm Veronika, and if you are a fan of porn sites, then it's likely that you've seen my hot body in action and compromising positions somewhere online. I'm not just some hot babe though I also have a naughty sense of humor. I had to keep a lid on my perverse sense of humor while I was filming so I'm excited to be able to combine them both here.

Read more ...

Lina

lina

Lina loves to play dress up, have tea parties and engage in lots of other types of imaginary past-times. Her writing often has a sort of floaty and dreamy cast to it. That being said, she loves raw sexual humor at its very core. You won't find her shrinking back from poking fun at those sexual situations that sometimes make us want to run to the hills screaming. Whether we do that in fear or ecstasy is not evident sometimes.

Primrose

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Primrose's name suited her very well in the beginning of her existence. Named by her mum who was stuck in a strange quasi-Victorian rut for most of Primrose's childhood, this writer grew up to be very restrained, never knowing anything about sex, boys or even her own body. A repressed soul on the outside, Primrose's inner fetish queen was unleashed soon after she finished tidying up the threads of her parents' estate after their tragic deaths. To say that Primrose has embraced her more sensual side in that time period would be an understatement. She loves to write about anything within the sexual realm that tickles her funny bone.

Patrick

patrick

Patrick is a pen name that this writer took to avoid having his family find out about his writing. He was educated in a strict Catholic school and disciplined frequently by nuns as he stared off into space while daydreaming about his next interlude with himself under the sheets. Patrick obtained some killer writing skills that he likes to pass on to our unsuspecting readers. So if you like sexual zingers that have a repressed Catholic undertone, you're going to love Patrick's writing.